It seems that the more places I see and experience, the bigger I realize the world to be. The more I become aware of, the more I realize how relatively little I know of it, how many places I have still to go, how much more there is to learn. Maybe that’s enlightenment enough: to know that there is no final resting place of the mind; no moment of smug clarity. Perhaps wisdom…is realizing how small I am, and unwise, and how far I have yet to go.Anthony Bourdain
Today is the first anniversary of the first day of my epic road trip. A lot has changed in my life (understatement), and I’m immeasurably happier than on my last day in San Francisco.
But I saw a lot on my road trip that I couldn’t really put into words. And I think Bourdain captured it in a way that I never could. So I thought I’d share to start the week.
A friend of mine, Jax, messaged me just before I left. She happened to reach out right after I’d had another of those “Are you sure you can’t find someone to go with you?” conversations with someone who meant well. I mostly had those conversations with men, but a few times women expressed fear for me as well, and I was spiraling into “Maybe everyone is right. Maybe this is a crazy idea. What am I thinking? What if something happens to me? To Tako?”
And then there was a message from Jax in my IG, saying that she had traveled by herself for a bit and it was the best thing she’d ever done, so she was excited for me to experience it. I told her it was a relief to hear that because I’d been overwhelmed the last couple of days by people worried for me.
She said something interesting that stuck in the back of my brain, and I still mull it over every now and then. She told me that she had gotten some strange responses as well, but that she never felt safer and stronger than when she was on her road trip.
I didn’t really understand what she meant until I thought my car was breaking down.
My point, I suppose, is this: as much as I’ve realized I have left to learn about the world, as Bourdain says so eloquently above, I have even more left to learn about myself.
Listening to: Atlas Genius