Suing & Rules of Engagement

I’m pretty upset at the moment, so forgive me if this post is a bit less diplomatic than I strive to be usually. My count is up to 12, and it’s been a rough morning.

Someone has been commenting on my blog and suggests I sue my old company. So let’s talk about that for a moment.

First of all, I have no grounds to sue my old company. I just plain don’t, and I’m not sure why anyone would think I would be interested in doing so since they weren’t involved in my story. I was no longer an employee when any of this began. They had no obligation to me.

Second of all, it’s my understanding that the company moved swiftly to fire the accused as soon as they received the evidence. If that’s untrue or incorrect, I am so sorry to anyone I have offended with this blog.

But today’s comment is the first time their swiftness to act has been called into question in a definable way. I haven’t been told otherwise by any of the women who have shared their stories with me, and no evidence was offered in the comment to prove the claim. So I really can’t…I just don’t know what to say.

Third of all, you’ve kind of missed the point.

Before I get to the part that I really need to discuss with you guys, I do want to address the commenter a little.

I know you’re coming from a place of love. For those that haven’t seen their comments, they’ve stated that their friend was fired unjustly for reporting sexual harassment. This is sadly so common and such a terrible experience to happen to anyone.

I am so sorry for your friend. I can’t offer legal advice. I would say they should take their evidence to a labor attorney and consult them on the matter. Consultations are generally free, and I wish your friend all the best and every luck I can.

Yes, we are all upset. Yes, we want to share our stories. And I want to hear those stories. Tell me your stories. But we need to keep this conversation universal. We can use that to help each other feel less alone and feel like we can move towards healing.

However, you used the company name and that doesn’t belong here. So I unfortunately had to delete the comment.

The point is not the players here. The point is not a company that you or I or anyone is upset with, and this is not the venue to point fingers or name names.

The point is the humans out there who are still suffering in silence. The point is sharing a story that is so common to so many of us.

Sexual harassment is not limited to women, which I know we all know. But it bears stating explicitly. I am a woman, and this is my story, so I approach from that perspective.

But I share this story with many men and women and non-gendered and other-gendered people.

I want this to be a dialogue. I want this to be a forum for people to share, discuss, engage with each other.

This isn’t meant to be a witch hunt. It’s a universal conversation. So I’ve put together some rules that I hope we all can follow.

Rules of Engagement

  1. Please do not use real names. If you do, your comment will be deleted.

  2. If you are insulting, your comment may be deleted. More likely, I’ll just discuss it or ignore it.

  3. Sexual harassment or discriminatory firing claims and all corroborating evidence should be taken to a lawyer immediately.

I hope that this can be a place for us to discuss something that we’ve always been encouraged to keep silent. This is a place of inclusion. This is a place of support and engaging.

Together, we can break the silence.

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